
Small Pox, polio, measles…all have been tackled by modern medical science and all roundly beaten. But some diseases remain a blight on society with the most destructive and debilitating being the curse of celebrity.
…but there is hope.
Although a full cure remains a distant dream scientists in Canada have managed to replicate the condition in laboratory conditions on normal members of the public.
In their seminal trial 100 people were fed 6 pints of beer each within a one hour period.
The results were startling, mirroring the behaviour and attitudes of many modern celebs.
It was observed that the subjects:
– talked excessively without making any sense
– became overly emotional
– couldn’t drive
– failed to think rationally
– argued over nothing
– refused to apologize when wrong.
The hope is that now the condition can be temporarily replicated a more complete understanding can be developed.
Thank God for Science.
Love,
Janie
I think you forgot accidentally boob exposure!! LOL! Cute post!!
The trouble is, to be a meaningful scientific test, they'd need a control group to not drink beer. And since most volunteers for these things are students… well, you can see the difficulty.
Lil Dreamer I think you mean "accidental" boob exposure, aka fame whoring.
Seeing as to how my band IS making forward progress, the disease of celebrity does worry me.
Thankfully I DO have my crew, The Hooligans, who keeps me fairly grounded…but the threat of celebrity is always on the horizon, y'know?
Feels good that there's a cure being worked on~! The last thing I want is to A) succumb to the vices of drinking and drugs and B) to have my junk exposed on TMZ.
I mean, I'm probably going to expose my junk on-stage ANYWAY, but why the hell do I wanna do it for those jackals?
Throw in a stint at rehab to "cure" them and the resemblances are uncanny!
Celebrity is almost as bad a disease as pregnancy.
Perfect and awesome. That list covers everything "overly dramatic, unsteady walking". And what Convictus and Lil Dreamer said, slip the slip and flip and flop 🙂
Don't be ridiculous Mark, Fetuses are NOT diseases. They're parasites.
So what happens when a celebrity gets drunk?
LOL finally a scientific study that makes sense..haha
Oh yea, this is a bad disease. Great job by scientists finding cures!
yes yes that's true very bad disease
Wouldn't it be awesome if people with actual talent were celebrated?
Without celebrities so many people would be out of a job. They have become a necessary evil. Like bacteria.
celebrities such as these are truly a cancer…
It won't work. Each time someone takes a picture of a celebrity, they get closer to immortality. We must stop taking pictures of them.
Nice post!
there should be a quarantine for them, somewhere far in the highlands of Northern Scotland, or on Iceland….
Ok that is called being drunk. It seems scientists have discovered that most celebrities are drunk…or high. Or maybe they have just killed off too many brain cells.
c is for see you next tuesday…? celebrities are lame, unless they are internet celebrities. those are cool as fuck.
When I drink, I also start issuing press releases about where I'm going to be in the upcoming days.
It's sort of awful, explaining why I don't drink anymore.
LOL – all they needed was a film crew following them around =)
Must be due to her wearing the cross necklace.
AHAHA yes. I wat to be part of these studies!
that's nothing. I conduct that kind of "research" at least 3 times a week
nice great idea
Wales is a lovely place, I can't believe I've only been a couple of times. The beaches were lovely too. Thanks for the nice comment! xxx
Overly emotional? Really? haha
Why don't they do such studies near my place? Drinking alcohol and acting like a jerk/celebrity for science would be awesome.
sooo… celebrity = puberty?
lol on kakuidori's comment. Some people I hope to never see or hear about again.
Are you suggesting that we should get celebrities drunk? I can't see any bad repercussions for this.